Water the Wilting Flower

 "When your patterns start to show, I see a pain that lies below."

This is a quote from KPop Demon Hunters, an animated Netflix movie with a beautiful message (highly recommend watching it, check out my analysis of it here: A Breakdown of the Message in KPop Demon Hunters).

This quote led me to think about human flaws, negative behavioral patterns, and our inner demons in great depth.

Embracing your demons doesn't mean letting them roam free and hurt others.
It's choosing to acknowledge the pain below the pattern, and finding ways for your demon to channel itself more healthily.
Our greatest weaknesses are our biggest strengths.
They're like wilting flowers, our flaws.
They need more affection and love to prosper.
So when somebody especially loves you for your flaws, it's not because they don't want you to grow.
It's actually because they do want you to grow.
You just don't realize the way to do that is to actually water the wilting flowers of our flaws.
Sing to them.
Talk to them.
Care for them.
Our flaws are just misunderstood creatures.

You know how people call little kids 'demons'?
Well, your actual demons are like that, too.
They're just little kids who're learning their way in life.
It's your duty to help them find ways to express themselves in a way that's true and good for both of you.

You've probably noticed that there seem to be different voices in your head.
Some might think it's 'healthier' to silence your inner critic.
Others might think that it's more efficient to silence your inner optimist.
But rather than the 'healthiest' one being preferred, it's about balance.
For all of them to get equal representation.
Equal love.
It's about dialogue, not monologue.
Let all the voices speak.

No matter what that part of you is like, it's still a part of...well, you.
And you can't just eliminate a part of you.
That's a disservice to yourself.
A disservice to the world, even.

Your internal dialogue translates into a monologue of your being for the outer world.
If you're going to suppress parts of your internal dialogue, then it's no wonder your outgoing monologue isn't looking so great.

You've probably heard of the idiom 'a wolf in sheep's clothing'.
I disagree with the idiom.
I believe the correct way to say it is 'a sheep in wolf's clothing'.
Because that's what we all are, in one way or another. 
That inner child is the sheep.
It's arguably the most underrepresented member of the council of your inner voices.

The evilest of deeds have the purest intentions.
There's always a pain below the pattern.
A beauty in the pain.
An aching, innocent beauty.

Maybe it was your inner child.
Maybe it was just a part of yourself that you'd suppressed.
Just trying to—
Survive.
A wilting flower—
that fought back.
For the slightest glimmer of hope—
that you would make peace with it.
So give it that chance.
Let that glimmer of hope glow.

As children grow older, their psychological complexity is enhanced.
They gain more experience; they discover and build their identity.
But oftentimes, they refuse to let their inner child represent themselves, even though it's literally part of their most core essence of being.
I mean, think about it.
Have you ever looked at an adult and wondered what they were like as a child?
Have you ever looked at a child and wondered what they'd be like as an adult?
What's the metamorphosis that occurs in between?
Who decides who's an adult, and who's not?
Who decides that the two are completely separate identities?
Every adult has an inner child.
Every child has an inner adult.
As we grow, the inner adult is nurtured—brought to the forefront because they're more 'practical'.
We ignore the inner child.
We create an imbalance.
And that is where—
The patterns start.
That is how deep the patterns run.

So, please.
Do not shame yourself for being you.
Now, being 'you' certainly doesn't mean you've got a get-out-of-jail-free card for your actions.
But it means that you need to find the deeper meaning behind your actions.
And translate it into symbolism that's healthier for both you and others.
This is a call for loving every part of yourself, even the parts you may think 'don't deserve love'.
Because if anything, they're the ones who need it the most.